I believe one of the hardest questions you can ask someone is, “how do you feel?” and expect not only an honest answer but a clear one. What I love about this week’s song is the dichotomy of emotions and ideas.
Lately ‘borderline’ anything seems like an appropriate response to someone asking how I feel. The fall is notoriously a bad time of year for me. I look around and see the days of shadow’s past and find their dark outline following me like a ghost. And just like a ghost, those shadow’s raise the hairs on my heart’s delicate pain receptors testing the borderlines of the day.
Not letting anyone break my stride will have to do for now. Perhaps that is my everyday borderline.
1/13/16- Dear Amanda,
I regret never saying this to you- you’re welcome for the t-shirt. I love you too. -Anna
I thought I would share the very special cake that was made for me today. Not only was it made with love, but topped with glittery lettering and filled with rainbow cake. Happy Birthday to Me!
It took me a long time to realize that I don’t have to go it alone. There was a time when I was convinced that asking or needing help was unsafe. It meant I “didn’t know” and that someone else did. What did I need to do to earn the help? What if I needed more than someone could offer? It all seemed so uncertain, so vulnerable and so trusting.
Today I had coffee with a friend that has been there for me over the years and who I think would also say that I have been there for her. She is someone who has helped teach me that I can show the darkest parts of my life and be held.
During our meet up, she paused the conversation and motioned toward her bag, saying she had something for me. Out of her bag she pulled a key on a bracelet. She called it a “giving key” that was once given to her during a time when she needed strength. The word strength in inscribed on the key as a reminder.
She explained that I take the key, wear it and hold onto it until I feel that someone else needs it and then I give it away. And right now, strength is just what the doctor ordered for me.
As the Beatles originally put it, I get by with a little help from my friends. This week’s song of the week, a remake of the classic, is a reminder of the strength in love.
To my friend, thank you for helping me get by.